Saturday 22 November 2014

Virginity - and why I am nervous for our kids

I am nervous for our children... and that doesn't just come from being a mum with an anxiety disorder.

The teenage years are horrible.  I remember them well and I know everyone reading this will remember them well.  The hormones, the pressure, the angst, the need for independence and not feeling as if you are getting enough, the decisions that you need to make about life (seriously, WHY are we expecting 17 year olds to know what they want to do with the rest of their life?!), and then there is everything sex related, but particularly the losing of one's virginity.

I remember being a teenager and the huge deal that was made about losing the 'big V'.  Parents and teachers were slamming home the point that you should wait until you are properly ready and that you lose it under the right circumstances.  Friends and peers brag about losing their virginity, about how awesome sex is, about what positions they've done it in, about how many people they have had sex with.  There is so much pressure from both sides - some of it intentional and some of it unintentional - and it makes for a hellishly confusing time.

I lost my virginity faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar too early.  Years too early.  So early that I am now ashamed about it, particularly about the way I lost it and who it was with.  The thought of any of our kids losing their virginity so young and in such a way fills me with dread.  I'm probably bloody lucky I was at boarding school when it happened to me and I didn't have to physically look at my parents when they found out about it.

But you know what?  In one way I am... I'm not sure that 'glad' is the right word, but because I can't think of another word, let's go with glad.  The one way I am glad that I lost my virginity so young is that I didn't have to put up with the pressure from either side.  When the rest of my friends and peers were going through the inner turmoil of should-I-or-shouldn't-I, I didn't have that worry.  I had lost it, that big, enormous, momentous, life-changing moment had been and gone (I might add that after I lost my virginity I didn't have sex for another four years).

I wish such a huge deal wasn't made about it, that teenagers and young adults could be given the tools required to make an informed decision for themselves (I know this is idealistic, not every teen or young adult has the mental capacity to do this!), without being told by x, y, and z, that a, b, or c was the right thing to do.

Having the benefit of hindsight (I know, old person saying...) I can see that too much emphasis is placed on the wrong aspects of losing your virginity.  It all seems to be about 'do have sex' or 'don't have sex' and then about age.  Teenagers are told 'DON'T HAVE SEX!' but they aren't told why.  They aren't given a chance for real dialogue about it (*I say this in a general sense, I know there ARE plenty of adults out there who have great dialogue re sex with their teens).  People seem to focus on the physical reasons to abstain, especially with regard to pregnancy and STI transmission, but it needs to go a lot further.  The mental side of things, the emotional side, the spiritual side.

But then the same can be said for the peer pressure side of things.  'It feels so good' yeah, true, it can feel good, but it can also be uncomfortable as well as opening up a new world of insecurities.  I didn't orgasm, I must be broken.  He/she didn't cum, I must be doing something wrong.  Sex doesn't feel good, there must be something wrong with me.

There is stigma attached to losing virginity too young or in the wrong circumstances, but there is also a stigma attatched to not losing one's virginity young enough. It is like if you have lost your virginity by the time you are 15 you are automatically a 'slut', if you haven't lost your virginity by the time you are 20 you are 'frigid' or there is obviously something wrong with you. 

It's a complete and utter contradiction.  What is so wrong with someone not losing their virginity until they are 20?  30? 40?  Older?   Why should it bother me if Jane Bloggs down the road didn't lose her virginity until she was 25?

Why can't people just accept that the decision to lose your virginity should be a private one, one that is made when each individual feels the time is right?  We (when I say we, I mean we as a society)  can give teenagers and young people tools to help them with that decision, we should be available for them to talk to about it if they want, we should be there to guide them if and when they want our guidance.  On the flip side, we should accept that not everyone is ready to lose their virginity in their teens and that some people may have no interest in losing it at all.

Virginity is a big deal - but it should be a big deal on an individual level - not a societal level.  I wish our four children could grow up in a society where virginity is what it is - having sex for the first time - and that the pressure so commonly associated with it, whether from the 'don't do it' or 'do it now!' camp, didn't exist. Losing your virginity should most be seen as special and I am by no means saying people should lose their virginity when they are too young mentally, emotionally and physically to cope with it.

I guess when I think about our children, I want them to not feel pressured to lose their virginity, but I also don't want them thinking sex is evil or a 'bad' thing to do.  I want them to be able to talk with us when they have questions or feel confused or just need a sounding board, and that, between my wife and I, we can give them the ability to make an informed decision and lose their virginity when the time is right for them, not when society thinks it is right for them.

Friday 14 November 2014

Late night masturbation... that leads to so much more

Well, my exams are all done for the year!  Now it's just the long wait to see if I have passed all my papers so I can plan what will hopefully be the final year of my degree... we should just ignore the fact I am already considering degree #2 or some postgrad work.

While studying for my last exam I got a little inspired and sidetracked and wrote a little something which I will probably include in the (novel length) story I am writing at the moment, about Lanie and her polyamorous relationship with twin brothers Blake and Logan.  The story is still in its early days but I am enjoying writing it!

I haven't posted anything for a few days so I wanted to share the little snippet that kept me from my exam study....  Enjoy!


It was 3am. After sleeping for maybe two hours at the most, Lanie was awake again and struggling to get back to sleep. She had tried counting sheep, she had tried a special muscle relaxation technique Blake swore by, she had tried shutting off her brain, she had even tried reading on her eReader but it was all to no avail; she was wide awake and frustrated.

As far as she was concerned there was only one thing left to try. Masturbation. Logan had a big week at work so waking him up for a little sexual relief wasn't an option, she would just have to get the dirty thoughts flowing and use her fingers to send her to sleep.

Dirty thoughts or perhaps some on-mute porn on her cellphone. Yes, that seemed easier. Picking her phone up from beside the bed she turned it to silent and flicked to the bookmarks screen, tapping on the icon for her go-to porn website.

But what was she in the mood for? Lesbian? Threesomes? Gang bangs? Oral? Spanking? Who the hell was she kidding in pretending to consider other categories of porn? As usual she went straight to the 'anal' category and began scrolling through for a thumbnail that appealed. She found one and was about to tap 'play' when she realised she would need a particularly intense orgasm to send her to the land of nod. Taking this into consideration, Lanie reached over and took her bullet vibrator from the nightstand.

Logan didn't stir as she did this and when she placed it against her clit then rolled onto her tummy and turned it on he remained completely oblivious. She was glad he was such a sound sleeper.

Her clit was already beginning to tingle and when she finally started the video the tingle turned into a dull throb. She skipped through the boring stuff and resumed the video when the two characters were naked. Lanie began to circle her hips in loose movements, the friction provided by the mattress beneath her adding to the thrumming vibrations of the bullet against her clitoris.

On screen the man was now pressing the tip of his cock against the woman's asshole and Lanie instinctively began pressing her hips more firmly against the mattress, in need of the added stimulation.

Lanie groaned internally as the man pushed inside the woman's ass. Lanie could feel her pussy getting wetter as she move her hips in tighter circles and opened her legs slightly, just enough to stretch her hole but not so much the bullet slipped out from between her labia. That was the last thing she needed!

On screen the couple were picking up the pace. Lanie's pussy was starting to feel hot and swollen while her clitoris was pulsating and sending shocks of pleasure through her body.

Lanie's toes began to curl as she felt her arousal moving on to a new phase – the pre-orgasm stage - when the pleasure became close to oberwhelming. She gripped the top of the mattress with her spare hand and tired to control her breathing knowing that if she could manage to stay silent the orgasm would be even more intense.

Her abdomen, hips and thighs were all rigid, providing more resistatnce against the mattress and therefore increasing the friction on her clit. How she wished she could scream!

Lanie almost screamed with shock when Logan suddenly moved on top of her. She had been so caught up in the video and the pleasure coursing through her she hadn't been aware of Logan waking up. Lanie moved to turn the video off but before she could Logan stopped her.

“Keep watching it,” he whispered into her ear.

Lanie whimpered an 'uh huh' in response and did as she was told. Logan got onto his knees and when she heard a lid being popped open she almost came from the anticipation alone. He was lubing up, which only meant one thing.

A finger ran down between her ass cheeks and when she felt that finger gently massaging her tight hole she groaned loudly, tilting her hips backward so he could use more pressure.

The tip of his lubed finger slowly pressed inside her hole, the tight muscles stretching to accommodate the finger and making her want more. Seven inches more.

Her breaths were coming in pants and when she finally felt the rounded tip of his cock against her asshole she gripped onto the bottom sheet and cried out loudly.

Logan's thick length felt divine as it slowly worked its way deeper into her and she had to resist the urge to get on all fours, knowing she would be rewarded with a killer orgasm if she kept as much friction on her clit as possible,

She couldn't really focus on the porn video, her eyesight was going blurry and her eyes kept rolling back in her head. Every stroke of Logan's cock was bringing her closer to the edge and as he started to move harder she dropped her phone and pressed her hands against the headboard.

The resistance allowed Logan to hit deeper and harder but it also allowed her to grind her hips more effectively against the mattress. Every muscle in her body began to tighten as her orgasm started to build. Any intention of a silent orgasm flew out the window and as she began crying out louder and louder, she had to brace her self for what was fast approaching.

Her pussy was sopping, her clit was aching, the feeling of fullness in her ass was only increasing with each stroke. She felt the very first orgasmic spasm in her clit and then screamed and writhed around beneath Logan as the full brunt of her orgasm struck.

She could feel it in her cunt and in her ass, she could feel it everywhere and it came wave after relentless wave until finally her body went still and the tension of orgasm was replaced by a soft, floaty feeling, a feeling of no longer being in her own body... just drifting.

When Logan pulled out of her she realised he had also cum. She had been so caught up in her own orgasm she had completely missed the chance to experience the feeling of Logan releasing his load into her.

She tried to form words, to tell him she loved him, that he had melted her brain, that she loved feeling him pressed against her like that, but all that came out was an incoherent mumble as sleep finally consumed her.

Monday 10 November 2014

My Sexy Saturday, week 67

Welcome to week 67 of My Sexy Saturday, a blog hop giving writers of erotica an opportunity to share 7 words, 7 sentences, or 7 paragraphs of their work.

Each week is based on a different theme and this week it is 'A Sexy First'.  For my contribution I have decided to share James and India's first time having sex in their new house...


When she came out a minute later James lost any ability to control himself. He had been expecting something fancy, lace, satin, bows, maybe stockings and heels to finish off the delectable ensemble. He was very wrong though. The third item of lingerie was a sheer long sleeve black babydoll which didn't have straps or lacy cups to hide her boobs, instead it had a single ribbon which tied just below her breasts. Her nipples were easily seen through the sheer fabric, hard and pointy, just calling to be licked, sucked, rubbed, tweaked and squeezed. In comparison to the other two pieces of lingerie it was relatively plain, but bloody hell it got his blood pumping - straight to his cock.

He tore his eyes from the heart attack inducing sight and as he watched India walking toward him he was afraid he might cum before she even reached the bed. Her boobs were jiggling slightly and had a hypnotic effect on him; as if on autopilot he pulled the blankets off him, exposing his cock to his very impressed looking audience of one. It was hard to breathe when India carefully straddled him at the hips and he feared he may pass out from a lack of oxygen. The raging throb in his cock increased as he felt India's pussy graze against the tip of his cock and though it (literally) pained him to do so he stopped himself from pulling her down on him, taking time to kiss the sexy woman perched on his cock.

India moaned against his mouth as they began kissing and he was glad she was as turned on as he was, it would have been a shame if he came after a minute or two and she wasn't even close to reaching her peak. Aware he wouldn't be able to maintain his restraint for much longer James broke off the kiss and pulled her forward, capturing one very hard nipple between his lips. India cried out in anguish as he gently sucked on and then licked her nipple, the layer of sheer fabric between his tongue and her nipple obviously providing a little added friction against her nipple.

The weight of her breast against his mouth had the effect it always did, a wild hunger began rising up inside him. He began to suck her nipple harder and harder, his fingers digging into her hips, his own hips instinctively arching upward, as if his cock was trying to find her wet, tight opening all by itself. He needed her pussy, he needed her wetness, her swollen warmth and it was with a flustered groan he quickly switched nipples, wanting to hold out as long as he could before finally pulling her down around him. He was losing the battle and began pulling at the other nipple while sucking extremely hard on the one in his mouth until – without realising – he was biting it.

India was moaning and crying out in pleasure as he tortured and tormented her nipple and he could feel her body trembling beneath his touch. James managed to remove his hand from India's other nipple and moved it between them so he could undo the bow which held the babydoll together below her breasts. He moved the fabric apart and groaned with delight as he finally felt her bare nipple against his tongue.

At the same time India slid down his cock, her pussy juices coated his hardness and almost instantly the hot, slick wetness caused a deep, almost painful throb in his cock. He tried to keep it at bay but India began moving her hips hard and fast against him and he knew he was fighting a losing battle. He pulled her down tightly at the hips and started to almost growl as he felt his orgasm building. India had already started screaming and in a case of deliciously perfectly timing they came together

Loud groans and screams filled their room as he pulled her down and pushed into her so hard she wasn't able to move her hips. Her pussy was tightly strangling his cock and each tight contraction around him prolonged his orgasm. Wave after wave they rode until finally their orgasms subsided.

Tuesday 4 November 2014

Lanie wants a spanking *flash fiction*

I was studying for an exam yesterday and surprisingly found myself inspired.  A spanking scene was brewing in my head and it just HAD to be written!

Just how cramming for my Editing & Publishing exam left to me feeling quite so inspired I really don't know!  It was a very good way to relax though... the best exam prep ever!


“You're very distracting, you know that?” Logan tried his hardest to sound annoyed but they both knew he was enjoying the distraction provided by his girlfriend modelling her latest purchase.
“Don't you like my dress?” Lanie did a good job of sounding innocent as she pouted at him in that sexy way of hers.
“Quite the opposite,” Logan declared, his eyes running over her dress for the billionth time.
“I hope I will look the part at this awards show,” Lanie sighed and Logan could tell she wasn't faking the concern in her voice.
“Looking the part?” Logan smirked and then stood up from where he was seated at the kitchen table, ignoring the paperwork he had brought home to do. “You are going to be the most beautiful woman there,” he reassured her and wasn't lying when he added, “every other woman will pale in comparison to you.”
“You're just saying that because you have to.” Lanie rolled her eyes at him.

He wasn't just saying it. The emerald green dress she wore looked as if it had been custom made for her. It had a plunging neckline that stopped one millimeter short of being too risqué and managed to look classy instead, and the way the fabric skimmed over her hips and waist was extremely alluring. Her already perfect-in-his-eyes hourglass figure was somehow even more breathtaking than usual and the longer he took in those curves he loved so dearly, the harder it became to concentrate on anything.

It didn't help that the blood flow to his brain seemed to have been diverted to his cock, which was fast waking up and standing to attention.

“If I didn't like your dress, would I be in this state right now?” he asked, motioning toward the growing tent in his pants. Lanie flashed him a sexy smile and he approached her, stopping when he was close enough to put his hands on her hips.
“You haven't seen the back view yet,” Lanie reminded him and slowly turned around.

Logan forgot to breathe as he took in the sight. Her ass. Holy fucking hell. He had been hard before she'd turned around but his cock was now rock solid... and his palm had started to itch.

Logan didn't give her a chance to turn back around and, with his hands on her hips, directed her across the room to the counter that separated the dining room from the kitchen. Lanie placed her hands on the countertop and stuck her ass out. Oh yes, she knew him so well.

Logan rubbed his hand slowly over her ass, his cock twitching excitedly as his fingers followed the curve around. He stopped when he heard a whimper from Lanie. Not wanting to risk ruining what was clearly a very expensive dress, Logan unzipped the gown and helped her out of it then placed it on the counter beside them.

She had no panties on and when Logan ran his hand down the curve of her ass again Lanie whimpered again and tilted her hips back. He heard her breath hitch as he broke the contact between her skin and his hand and as he brought the hand down on her ass she let out a loud moan of either pleasure or relief. Maybe it was both.

Exactly how long had she been craving a good spanking?

Logan knew how she liked to be spanked and wasted no time in bringing his hand down on her ass again, and again, and again. Lanie's moans and cries were loud from the start and something about the volume spurred him on.

Over and over his hand came down on her ass, the blotchy red handprint quickly developed into a redder and more defined shape with each blow of his hand against the tender flesh. Lanie was moving her hips in circular motions and when he stopped after every few blows to rub his hand gently over the reddening handprint, he had to resist the urge to drop his pants, step in behind her and feel the undulations of her hips with his cock buried deep inside her pussy.

“Harder,” Lanie begged breathlessly and Logan immediately did as she asked.

Her cries and moans became louder, the motion of her hips tightened and sped up, and he could see wetness beginning to coat her inner thighs. The scent of her sex was faint but intoxicating and his cock was now uncomfortably hard.

Knowing from the noises she was making that they had reached the stage where she would no longer feel pain, Logan began spanking her with more force. Lanie's moans became screams and she began gripping the counter so hard her knuckles went white. His palm was stinging, her ass was a flaming red colour and the heat radiating off it was unbelievable.

Lanie started to tremble and Logan knew she was close to the edge. His own limit was also perilously close and without thinking about it he pulled his pants and boxers down with one hand while spanking her with the other. With his cock free, he put one hand on her hips and with the other guided his cock to her hole.

When he was lined up he moved his other hand to her hips and pulled her back against him as he thrust forward, impaling her on his cock. Both of them made strangled screams of pleasure as he filled her swollen cunt. Their instincts took over and as he slammed in and out of her, hard and fast, Lanie pressed back into him allowing him to hit as deeply as possible.

His orgasm had started to build the moment he felt her drenched heat on the tip of his cock and after only ten forceful, deep thrusts he could feel his body tensing in anticipation. Lanie's pussy had an iron-like grip on his cock and at the exact moment his orgasm erupted, he felt her come undone around him as her orgasm struck.

She pushed back, he pushed forward and held tightly to her hips. Their screams and groans were loud, hers high pitched, his deep and guttural; wave after wave they rode together, until the tension dissolved from their bodies and they collapsed into a sweaty, comatose heap on the floor.

Sunday 2 November 2014

My Sexy Saturday, week 66

Welcome to week 66 of My Sexy Saturday, a blog hop which gives writers of erotica a chance to share 7 words, 7 sentences, or 7 paragraphs from a published work or work in progress.  Each week there is a special, sexy theme and this week the theme is 'A Sexy Date Night'.

When looking for a suitable excerpt I realised my characters don't go on nearly enough dates so that is something I plan to rectify in the very near future!

The excerpt I finally decided on is from one of my earliest works and is one that will likely go unread by everyone except my wife!  The couple on a sexy date in this story are Elle and Carter.  Elle is pregnant and they have spent the day at the mall shopping for baby stuff.  They have some time to kill before joining her parents for dinner so decide to go on a spontaneous movie date... giving the pregnant (and very horny) Elle a chance to live out one of her naughtiest fantasies.  Sex in a cinema.


You're evil,” Carter's voice came as a flustered whisper. 
 I have no idea why you would say that, sweet, dear, gorgeous, utterly fuckable fiance of mine...” Elle managed to feign innocence just seconds before squeezing his cock again, causing him to bite back a groan.
 You do realise we're in public, right?” he asked and Elle nodded, giving him a wry little smile.

Yes, I realise that we are in public and that my hand is wrapped around your deliciously hard cock,” she replied sweetly, squeezing him even harder which caused him to dig his fingers into the armrests of the cinema seat.
 Bub, we shouldn't do this,” his voice an odd mix of panic and excitement. She squeezed him again, this time harder.
 Oh, I know we shouldn't be, but surely you know by now that in my delicate state I am prone to libido swings and you wouldn't want to upset your pregnant fiancée by turning down her sexual advances, would you?” Elle replied in a very serious tone of voice and when he bit her neck in response she knew she had won.

Saturday 1 November 2014

I am a sex blogging superhero!

I have my blog listed on the Kinkly website and a while back they announced they were taking
nominations for their 'Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2014' competition... I was shocked when yesterday I received an email saying that I was in the top 100!

Writing about sex and writing erotica are both passions of mine and it felt great to get recognition for it.  It's obviously not something I can scream from the rooftops or share in my monthly 'update of my life' email I send to all my family [please note: I don't actually send this email...],  but it is still hellishly exciting for me. 

Me.  I never get chosen for anything.  I never win.  I am never anything but average... so while this award might not seem like a huge deal to some people, it IS pretty major to me.  My self confidence and self belief have never been particularly high, so to receive recognition that hey... some people out there actually read & like my blog! it is pretty awesome!

Congratulations to everyone else who made the top 100 and to everyone who was nominated!

If you want to read the full list you can find it  here.  While you're at it check out Kinkly, it is a great resource for everything sex related (probably best not to look at work though!).